Who’s to blame for laundry

**Warning: This post contains deep theological ideas**

I have an ongoing battle with laundry and I’m losing.

I’ve been wondering why, how did this happen?  It doesn’t matter how I try to keep up with it – once a week, a load a day, twelve loads a day – it doesn’t work.  I am always, always on the losing side.  And just when I think I might, just might, have the upper hand, I turn around and there it is, laughing an evil laugh at me.  It’s frightening when your laundry laughs at you.

Then the other day it hit me.  I know how it started and I know who’s to blame.

Back in the Garden of Eden things were clicking along just peachy and Adam and Eve had no laundry because they had no clothes but they didn’t know and they didn’t care.  Life was good.  They were living the dream, laundry free.

Then along came that damn snake and everything was ruined.  They realized they were naked, they were embarrassed, decided they needed clothes and then bam! the first load of laundry right there and it just snowballed after that.

Now, here is where I think we need to dig a little deeper because the common reasoning is that, since it was Eve that took the first bite of the apple it would be her fault, right?  Wrong, I say.  Let’s take a closer look.

First, we can assume, the ancient world being what it was, that it was likely a man who recorded the story and men are not good and relaying information.


Husband:  “oh did I tell you Bob and work, his wife, Robin…”

Wife: “you mean Becky”

Husband: “right, Becky, anyway she had the baby”

Wife: “wow! when did that happen?”

Husband: “ummm…..last week? maybe week before last?… definitely in the last month”

Wife: “and your just telling me now? was it a boy or a girl”

Husband: “ummmmm…..a boy? no, I think a girl, maybe?  it was definitely a baby”

Wife: “ok, how much did it weigh, how long was he or she?”

Husband: “I don’t know! it was bigger than a football and smaller than a watermelon, average baby size”

Wife: “do you at least know what they name him/her/it?”

Husband: “Frank Betty Sue”

Wife: “no they didn’t, your making that up”

Husband: “maybe, maybe not, they had a baby do you really need to know anything else?”

See, men are not good at relaying details.  So, there’s a pretty darn good chance that there might be more to the story then “Eve ate the apple”.

I mean think about it.  It’s just the two of them.  Eve has no girlfriends to talk to, none, just Adam.  More than likely she wanted to talk to him about her day, how things were going in the Garden, how maybe they should think about taking a vacation or a long weekend to go check out things on the west side of the garden, or did he notice the sunrise this morning or that cute little animal over under the lilac bush and what should they call it?

And Adam, was probably drinking his coffee, reading the paper, nodding saying “uh, right, yeah”.

Day after day, Eve began to get frustrated and finally she says “the Garden’s on fire” And Adam says from behind his paper between gulps of coffee “sure, I thought so too”.  And so Eve goes out for a walk.

I mean who could blame her really, for stopping to chat with someone who would listen.  So it happened to be a snake and she maybe should have thought twice but she was desperate.  And after taking a walk probably needed a snack.  But it was pretty clearly Adam who drove her to that desperation and so I think we can see that he deserves most, if not all of the blame.

Laundry is Adam’s fault.  Yep, if it weren’t for Adam we would all be sitting around naked today with no laundry piles sitting around laughing at us.

On second thought, maybe it’s just as well…..it gets pretty cold in Minnesota…..and the thought of moving cattle in the buff kind of makes me cringe……

I still blame Adam though, it makes me feel better when I can blame someone else for my problems.

I guess I’ll head out now, off to work on the laundry, unless I can think of something else to do between the computer and the laundry room.

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